In memoriam – Ilze Halliday (June 3, 1982 – Sept 6, 1985)

My darling girl

You’ve been gone for 27 years today. Taken from us so rudely, so suddenly…I still cannot find peace in my heart. The questions keep on circling my mind…’Why you?’ ‘Why in such a horrible fashion?’ I will never understand, and, perhaps I’m not supposed to. Your death did not make sense…it ruined my whole life, changed me in ways I cannot really describe, but, in many other ways, it did make me stronger and showed me that Death doesn’t distinguish between age or gender, Death doesn’t care if you are 3, 13 or 93…if It wants you…It takes you. Now, at this late stage, I do get it in some way – not why you had to die – but that you did indeed DIE; that is a fact that will remain, even though I cry every day, when I remember our songs, our movies and our games…the fact that it did indeed happen and that I am unable to change that….THIS I understand. But you know what, if I could change it, if I could go back in time and convince my brother NOT to go out on that Friday night with his family, I will indeed try…..that is the only thing in my life I wish were different. You see, you were my light, my lovely, my mini-me….you were the keeper of my heart, my soul….Illie, you were my everything. And….GOD!! How I wish you were here!!!

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